A recent excavation of ancient Argentinian ruins, revealed a remarkable revelation. It appears that the fatal misfortune, of this precious prehistoric pussycat, can be traced to its preference for pudgy Paleolithic people.

No longer delighted with dining on deer or consuming caribou, the gato perezoso (Spanish for “lazy cat”) chose to change its culinary cravings, by exclusively eating non-nomadic Neanderthals.

Feline fossil findings procured in Patagonia, continue to confound consultants. All proof points to profound patterns of great gastric growth.

“There are substantial signs showing a switch in the saber-tooth tiger’s diet,” archeologist Dave Diggums articulates.

“Their normally nutritious fast food, provided perfect pieces of protein, but was consistently a challenge to catch.”

“At some strategic stage, they simply started using human habitats as their favorite feeding facility,” Dave descriptively declares.

A telling testimony, that suggests these bygone beasts developed what researchers are calling the “caveman cafeteria complex.”

Rather than racing rapidly to reach running rabbits across rocky regions, these carnivorous kittens realized they could rest right outside a residential refuge and receive readily available rations.

“We witnessed widened waistlines and substantially swollen skeletal structures,” reports paleontologist Paula Peterson.

“These predators were literally lunching themselves to death on a steady stream of sedentary snacks.”

Modern medical measurements show, that serious circulatory setbacks, and significantly swollen skeletal structures, severely sabotaged the cats’ stalking skills.

What began as basic buffet behavior, became a bitter biological burden.

“Consuming chubby cavemen, contributed to cardiovascular catastrophes in these creatures, through climbing cholesterol counts,” explains Dr. Helen Hearting, a carnivore cardiologist.

“When you fade out the frenzy from the feast,” Helen highlights, “you also remove the healthy hustling, that normally nurtures the nimble nature, of these majestic midnight marauders.”

These telltale tidbits, have turned the traditional extinction theory, into tatters. Rather than humans hunting predators into purgatory, these careless cats may have literally eaten themselves out of existence.

The species centered scientific team, plans to expand their investigatory inquiry throughout South America. Their desire is to determine if this dietary disaster, conceivably contributed to other Ice Age extinctions.

As we encounter our own obesity crisis, perhaps we should learn the lesson of these hefty hunters:

On occasion, convenience kills.

So the next time you plan to pick up that easily accessible portion, remember the fate of these gato perezosos – and maybe go for a walk instead.